Sunshine, Happiness, and Loving Life (again)

February 2010

I just found an entry in my old journal that I had written way back in July of last year. My, how my life has turned around !!

Unbelievable.

I am happy to report that I find myself in a new place, a better place...I truly am an entirely different person - so full of energy and loving life!

The following is a brief update of my family, and I also touch on some things that I spoke of in my last entry...


Brandon, Jane, Sarah, and Christian:

Brandon has recuperated and is once again strong, and healthy. He is bursting at the seams with such love and pride for his family. His business is going strong, and that in itself has helped his self confidence grow in leaps and bounds. He is loving the role of fatherhood, and has accepted it with such grace and ease.  I have never ever seen him as happy as he is right now, and that makes me, his concerned mother, a very happy woman ...

Jane just gave birth to Christian, our first grandchild, and she is glowing... So much joy in her eyes. She has the most infectious smile...and she smiles a lot. Her happiness is contagious. I find myself smiling whenever I am around her. After years of running her own business, Jane is a stay-at-home Mom. This is a big change for her - but in a good way. She helps Brandon out by working the business from their home office, and whenever she needs to meet with clients, I have the privelege of helping out with the babies !!  I always look forward to spending time with her, gossiping, laughing, sharing thoughts and ideas. I feel so blessed that she is a part of our lives, and the mother of our grandchildren...

Sarah pulled through her hospital ordeal and is thriving. It was questionable for a while whether she would make it to her next birthday. Now, you wouldn't even know that she went through everything that she did. She truly is a fighter. I am impressed, and am taking note of her strength and courage. For a 5 year old, she has gone through so much.I believe she is an angel in embodiment, and we have so much to learn from her...

Our new grandchild Christian is the most beautiful baby!!  Every little coo and whimper is a miracle in itself. Dave and I gaze at him in total amazement. I have come to believe that he is a very old soul in a tiny young body. Christian is a gift from above. He came here for a reason - his birth has once again opened my eyes to the miracle of life ...  I realize that yes, my life is worth fighting for...

Tiana, Sean, and Kona:

Tiana and Sean have really stepped up to the plate. They have been there for Brandon, Jane, and always, always here for Dave and I. So understanding and supportive. Never asking for anything in return. They are such a positive force in all of our lives.

Sean, cooking his comfort foods, and sharing his hilarious stories...he always brings the element of laughter into our little group.Yet I know he is concerned with all that we have been through.He has made  a point of being there for  all of  my doctor appointments, along with the rest of the family.Always there to be supportive and lend a helping hand... I love seeing that gentle, caring side of him.

Tiana, with her practical ideas, and nurturing ways, she has always been the responsible one.Telling me her honest opinion, coming with me to the Guinea Pig classes, tapping the doll for me whenever she is able...beating me to the doctors office whenever I have an appointment - sitting there, waiting patiently with a smile, and always reassuring me that I will live a long life. Her surprise visits, and our mother/daughter talks are something that I live for..I keep them close to my heart, and will  cherish them forever. I love her so much...

Then there is Kona, my loving granddog. He was rescued from a shelter...only days from being put to sleep. Sean and Tiana found him on the internet, and adopted him on the spot. He has been showing his gratitude ever since. A ray of sunshine in all of our lives. Whenever I am  down and out, Kona will come for a visit and stay with me...cuddling close, lying in bed with me, whimpering whenever he is close enough to detect my cancer, looking at me with those beautiful,soulful eyes, as if to tell me, "I am here for you."

Omi (my Mom) :

My Mom has recuperated and is doing quite well. After living with us for almost two years,she has decided to move back to her own home with my sister Cherie. It was an adjustment for Dave and I at first. However, in retrospect, it was best for all concerned. Since she has an aortic aneurysm, we decided that it was better that she not know the truth. It was hard keeping it a secret while she was staying with us. I had so many appointments to go to, live guinea pig and internet classes to attend, needing private time for tapping my doll, it was difficult keeping it under wraps. It's funny how life unfolds... This past January, she informed us that she needed to spend some time with my sister Cherie, who is still trying to adjust to life alone, after losing her husband to cancer two years ago... I miss my Mom, but I know she is happy where she is right now, and that makes me happy...

Dave and I:

We are loving our new role as Grandparents.We feel the birth of Christian has opened up a new chapter in our lives....a happy one.

Dave's business is once again busy. He has a twinkle in his eyes, and a renewed self confidence. I love seeing that. When he is in 'the zone', he is unstoppable. I know, I have had the pleasure of witnessing it in the past. He also accompanies me to every guinea pig class that he can. He does dowsing with me on a daily basis, and is taking classes in tui na, and tong ren, to better help me in the healing process. Always, looking towards the future, Dave loves to talk of the good things to come ...

His face lights up when he talks of this coming summer....once again, we will be riding our Goldwing, with the sun beating down on our backs, hair flying in the wind ... we will be dancing our hearts out under the stars at the Seashell at Hampton Beach...and most of all we will be spending time with our grandchildren, Sarah and Christian as much as possible...

Dave loves to dream with me of vacations to Hawaii, cruises to the Carribean, Disney World with the grandchildren ... they go on and on , and I love dreaming with him...

When I dream with my husband, I truly believe there is a future ahead of us, and these dreams will come true...  We will grow to a ripe old age together... and he will always be my Prince Charming...

And Me?...

I am doing great. No, I take that back. I am doing better than great, I am doing FANTASTIC !

I am an Oma (finally!) . I have a new spring in my step and my heart is bursting with happiness. Sometimes I find it too hard to contain, and I break out into a gleeful song...much to the chagrin of my dear, sweet husband...(I am told that I sound like a munchkin when I sing, but I just can't help myself !)

I am diligently working at cleaning my body of the cancer cells that silently crept their way in. My plan of attack is working, and my body is very happy.

And so is my soul...

These past three months have opened so many doors for me. So many new adventures. Friends, as close as an arms length and reaching out from as far as Hawaii...I feel so blessed.I have grown. I have blossomed. I have thrived. My heart bursts with love and gratitude every single minute of my existence.

I have found inner peace...

Yes, life is good.

It's filled with sunshine and happiness...

And best of all...

I am loving life (again) !!